Sir Edmund Scatwell

Sir Edmund Scatwell has spent a lifetime whispering at things that would rather not be whispered at: moths, mildew, the common bathmat. He is the world’s foremost authority on scat. Sit very still. The flush is a seasonal visitor: it comes when it is ready, and it has never once been early.

The fee, in his words“And here… if one listens closely… the rest of the verse awaits. Ninety-nine cents.”